As it is Christmas, we have a real treat for you – MEET the one and only OLLIE, a complete LEGEND. A rescue dog from the Newbury Dog Trust, he is believed to be half Corgi, half German Shepherd dog. Yes, that is right, the logistics of such a romance are mindboggling, but where there is a will there is often a way.

What we can tell you is that he is 100% CHARACTER and you cannot help but fall in love with him. Our Ben, the multi-tasking mail order guru, astrophysicist and demon baker is just one of his humans and occasionally brings him in on a Royal State Visit to cheer his subjects.

What’s the look that you are going for?

Self-appointed ‘FUN POLICE’ - no football celebrations allowed at all, EVER. We also think he has rather has the look of a 1970’s football manager in a sheepskin coat, a reference that flies straight over the heads of younger members of staff along with Bagpuss and Mr Benn.

Favourite Sport

Has to be RUGBY. He is a natural Prop, short and stocky and once he gets the ball he refuses to give it up. This sadly has cut short many a game.

Favourite food?

SAUSAGES, anytime, anywhere. They do not even touch the sides.

Weirdest Habit?

He loves to munch on the stalks of Cavalo Nero, but never the leaves – now what’s that all about?

Evidence of Royal Association?

Ollie has his own THRONE, oops ‘chair’, which is of course the most ornate one in the house with the best view of the telly. Ben says he spends a lot of time in it brooding or perhaps more accurately ‘plotting’, waIting for you to walk through the door.

Basically human, he completely lacks a ‘poker face’.

Sometimes he relents and deigns to sit on your lap but be warned this takes commitment on your part as he will not want to move for several hours.

Worst Habits

He barks very loudly and quite frequently. Always keen to share his opinion about literally anything, well we all know someone like that.